Tag Archive for 'marriage'

my wife.

I have been married to my wife for two years.

I don’t know why she decided to marry me, but I’m glad she did. And all of this gladness is not just from her presence, who she is, or her beauty. This joy and gladness that I have received from my wife is from the direction she has steered my life. If you mentioned it to her, she wouldn’t even take the credit for directing my life… because she did it indirectly through the third strand in our cord.

faith, hope, and lovenot in or for me…

My wife had faith in Jesus. Faith that, while I was wandering in confusion down a wide and paved road, He would guide me to a narrow gate and lead me down a narrow path.

My wife had hope in Jesus. Hope that, while I was struggling in sin and contentment with no end in sight, He was big enough to stop it.

My wife had love for Jesus. A love that, while I was unlovable and an empty cup, He would fill her cup to overflow into mine.

My joy in my marriage to my wife is rooted in the joy of salvation and redemption given by our merciful Redeemer.

My wife loves me. To be loved by my wife is to see the love of Christ. You want a good love story? Love like Christ… and you’ll find a love that’s so much greater than the stories of this world.

Soggy turtle sandwiches

So one day, God created marriage. And it was a sandwich. It was a wonderful sandwich and God made it how He wanted to because He’s wise and He’s God and all that. So man comes along and wants God’s sandwich to be a turtle. Man really, really wants a turtle. So man looks at God’s sandwich and fights back and forth over whether it’s a sandwich or turtle. Man even goes so far as legislating that God’s sandwich is a turtle. Well clearly it’s still a sandwich, right? Well, no. Man said it’s a turtle now.  So God sees man take His sandwich and put it in a pond. And I believe God’s heart breaks. Not because His sandwich is soggy, but because God gave His sandwich to us and we decided it wasn’t good enough. And man WILL decide that they don’t want God’s soggy turtle sandwich anymore.  And man WILL move on to take another of God’s gifts and turn it into something they want and that He didn’t intend. History repeats itself.

be satisfied, husbands, part 2

“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— for we are members of his body.” Ephesians 5:25-30

Marriage is a covenant bond between a man, a woman, and God… a covenant bond between one selfish sinner, another selfish sinner, and a holy, righteous God.

God the Father sacrificed His Son for our redemption.  Christ cares for His church and selflessly gave His life for us.  We are members of Christ’s body.  Our wives are members of our body.  No one ever hated their own body.  In the way Christ cares for His body, we are commanded to care for ours.  He who loves his wife loves himself.  We must nourish our body, our wives, ourselves.  We are to love our wives, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word.  The Word.  We are called to live the Word, breathe the Word, speak the Word, wash our wives with the Word.  Like the flood of mercy and grace in which our Father sweeps us away, we should cover our wives in a flood of mercy and grace… the Word (John 1:1).  We must center ourselves in the Word to be able to know the Word.  The Word is Christ and Christ is the Word.  Our source of endless love, mercy, and grace for our wives can only come from the endless spring that is Christ (Psalm 23:5).  We will fail to love our wives when we try to provide mercy and grace from our own reserves.  We will empty ourselves.  As husbands, we cannot stand ankle deep in God’s mercy and grace.  We must walk toward the crashing waves.  We cannot touch the bottom.  We cannot turn back.  No final breath, no gasps for air.  Drown.  He is our breath and He will fill us.  Center yourself in the Word, in Christ, and then wash your wife in the Word.  Drown her in the Lord’s mercy and grace.

Sacrifice your wants, your needs, your desires, your dreams, your aspirations, your self… for your wife… but not for your wife’s sake.  The point is not to sacrifice yourself so you can focus on her wants, needs, desires, aspirations.  Sacrifice yourself so that you may be filled with Christ.  If you want to be the man your wife longs for, be Christ.  “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me” (Galatians 2:20).  The only place two sinners can be satisfied with each other is in Christ.  Selfishness leads to broken marriages (James 3:16).  Self must not exist in marriage.  When we drown ourselves in Christ, we become patient, we become kind.  We won’t envy, boast, or be full of pride.  We will honor our wives.  We won’t be quick to anger.  We won’t hold a record of wrongs.  Husbands, rejoice in the truth and turn away now from all that is evil.

We are not called to spend our lives building sand castles, splashing on the beach.  Step into the deep.  Lose your footing and be swept away by Christ.

be satisfied, part 1

This is my first post in a series of three that will briefly address a few thoughts I have gathered in my <2 years of marriage. I was given the following prose, typed in Courier, and it summarizes my thoughts that will come in the next two parts.

“Everyone longs to give themselves completely to someone — to have a deep soul relationship with another — to be loved thoroughly and exclusively. But God to a Christian says, “No, not until you are satisfied, fulfilled and content with being loved by Me alone — with giving yourself totally and unreservedly to Me — to having an intensely personal and unique relationship with Me alone, discovering that only in Me is your satisfaction to be found, will you be capable of the perfect human relationship that I have planned for you. You will never be united with another until you are united with me, exclusive of anyone or anything else, exclusive of any other desires or longings. I want you to stop planning, stop wishing, and allow Me to give you the most thrilling plan existing — one that you cannot imagine. I want you to have the best. Please allow me to bring it to you. You just keep watching Me, expecting the greatest things — keep experiencing the satisfaction that I am. Keep listening and learning the things I tell you. You just wait. That’s all.

Don’t be anxious. Don’t worry. Don’t look around at the things that others have gotten or that I’ve given them. Don’t look at the things you think you want. You just keep looking off and away up at Me, or you’ll miss what I want to show you.

And then when you’re ready, I’ll surprise you with a love far more wonderful than any you would dream of. You see, until you are ready and until the one I have for you is ready (I am working even this moment to have both of you ready at the same time), until you are both satisfied exclusively with Me and the life I prepared for you, you won’t be able to experience the love that exemplifies your relationship with Me, and is thus the perfect love.

And dear one, I want you to have this most wonderful love. I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your relationship with Me and to enjoy materially and concretely the everlasting union of beauty, perfection, and love that I offer you with Myself. Know that I love you utterly.”

1 Corinthians 1:10




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